The Boldness Barometer: Finding Your Way to Assertive Communication

A few years ago, I was driving to a speaking gig, rehearsing my talk on communication when this notion came to me: The Boldness Barometer. Yes, I like alliteration. The idea is that assertiveness exists on a spectrum from Not Assertive to Too Assertive. Let’s look at both ends of the spectrum and figure out how to find balance. On one side of the spectrum are... Keep Reading »

“I Wish I Could Have a Cookie” Is Not a Question

Have you ever felt that you’ve clearly asked for something from someone but they never “got” the message? Perhaps you were direct in your mind but not with the words that came out of your mouth.

In my program Be Bold, Not Bossy and in my one-on-one private coaching, I talk a lot about how the nuances of our communication habits affect the outcomes of our conversations. For instance, overuse of the words “just” or “sorry” send unintentional signals of subordination. Editing them out of conversations – both in email and face-to-face – can make significant positive improvements as to how we’re perceived.

Clarity in how we communicate is critical to getting the results we want. These habits are formed early and show up throughout life but they can also be altered.

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